CHANGE THE SUBJECT


After living over three months in an apartment complex for people over 62 and listening to group conversations periodically, I'm at a loss about handling future encounters when health issues are the primary topic.

 

If you're around people my age for longer than a few minutes, the conversation invariably centers on various ailments, operations, and conditions. It's true; old folks talk a LOT about their illnesses!

 

I've had quite a few health and physical issues over the past five years, none of which will kill me, but they are annoying as heck. I long for distractions from those topics. I don't want to hear that someone living here has had four hip replacements when I'm facing the possibility of a hip revision soon or to be told while I'm waiting to go to the nearest ER with symptoms of diverticulitis that someone's relative had part of their colon removed due to the very same condition. Hearing about ailments of people I barely know is depressing and too close for comfort, although I'm always concerned about the health of those I hold dear! I am fully aware that as we age, things fall apart. Sadly, none of us will live forever or be healthy until our last breath.

 

I was seated next to an older gentleman at a recent concert/political rally. I did not know him before he sat next to me.  For the first ten minutes, we talked about our shared support of various candidates when he suddenly told me that he had COVID two years ago, almost died, and lost a lot of weight while hospitalized in ICU for a long time. Even though I felt sympathy for him, I couldn't believe how quickly the conversation did a 180, but that's how it goes around those of a certain age.

 

A former long-time man-friend of mine responds yearly to my greeting card wishing him a happy birthday on Christmas Eve. It's an easy birthday to remember. He always tells me how much he appreciates my card. He also adds a few sentences describing how he almost died from some ailment in the past year. This exchange has been happening for the past ten years, though I realize there will be a year I will no longer hear from him, which will be heartbreaking. I would rather hear that he recovered from an illness than know that his last one was the final act.

 

I should learn the art of changing the subject, but I'm usually stuck in whatever health issue is discussed while worrying about what lies ahead rather than using my wits to talk about something else. What about religion or politics? Uh, no. Due to the extreme political divisiveness in our country, I would only discuss the subject if I was with like-minded people, even though politics is one of my favorite subjects. 

 

Music, books, and movies are still safe topics, aren't they?!!  Oh, and what about our perfect, beautiful grandchildren?



 

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