GEEZER DATING in 2021: Guidelines for Men


I've been divorced for many years and don't want to marry again, although I have periodically met potential partners through online dating sites for the past ten years. Several of the great guys I met through the years proved to be excellent companions for a while. My experiences could fill a book, but I wonder if anyone would be interested in reading about old folks dating. I go through periods when I simply am not in the mood to meet anyone new, and it's primarily because of too many dismal recent experiences I've had when encountering someone for the first time. Lately, the men in my shrinking pool of potential partners have aged considerably and had various health or personality issues, or they are my political opposite, which immediately eliminates them. There seems to always be a deal-breaker in these meetups, even though I desperately try to weed out the ones I know would not be a good match before I embark on the inevitable meet-and-greet process.
I'm fully aware that the common denominator in not finding or hanging on to relationships for very long is me. However, hope springs eternal, and maybe someday…
If I could wave a wand to assist men on these online dating sites (and thus me!), it would be the following suggestions to help them find their special partner:
1. Don't post pictures of yourself more than two years old, even if you think you haven't changed. We've all aged, and we're not objective regarding ourselves. If you have a "pretty mirror," please get a patent and mass-produce it. You'll be a billionaire in short order.
2. Don't post pictures of yourself with dead fish or deer. You might be proud of what you killed or caught, but the rest of us don't find that attractive.
3. Don't post selfies while sitting in a recliner or bed with your shirt off. It's hideous when you're shooting the picture from your lap. Those second and third chins and nose and chest hairs are disgusting.
4. If you're sincerely interested in finding someone compatible, posting pictures of yourself with your ex-wife or ex-girlfriend is not a good idea. Talking about an ex when you first meet someone new is even worse. When you're ready to put the past behind you and live in the present with the hope of a future with someone new, that's when it's time to join a dating site.
5. If you've let your beard and hair grow for the past several years, cut it off or at least trim it nicely. All we can think about when seeing those god-awful beards is food getting stuck in the mass of hair hanging from your face.
6. If you have a life-limiting condition, it's only fair to disclose it in your profile.
7. If your partner recently died, you may need to wait a year before trying to meet someone. Joining a dating site shortly after losing someone is like falling out of a nest and desperately trying to find a new nest on the way down. It's not fair to a potential partner, as it's more about your needs than who she is. Likewise, spending 30 to 40 minutes talking about her when you meet someone for the first time will likely result in no future. Limit your dating pool to widows.
8. Never lie about your age or post pictures of a much slimmer version of yourself. There will be no future with the person you deceived.
9. When you first meet someone, don't dominate the conversation. There are certain clues that you might be boring, such as they frequently look off into the distance or at their phones. You've lost them when they look at their watch and suddenly remember they must be someplace else. If you are talking too much, don't suddenly say to the woman, "So, tell me about yourself." She'll know you're not genuinely interested in her because you didn't ask something specific. Hint: memorize her profile and ask about her interests, job, volunteer activities, or children.
10. Don't talk about sex or your ability to still have sex at your age when you first meet someone new. Tinder might be more suited to your needs. Just saying.
I hope the above ten points will be helpful to those "of a certain age" who are in the dating world. Most of the suggestions apply to both genders, as I have heard numerous complaints about women posting pictures from many pounds and years ago on dating sites. It's never a good idea to deceive people you've yet to meet. No one is perfect, and everyone has baggage, but we should leave our bags in storage.
And for those in long-term successful relationships, you're incredibly fortunate!


                                                     No, thanks!




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